Another Wednesday, another post of things I’m thankful for!
Most of the time I try to be super positive, especially about my journey, but y’all have to know that yesterday was a crappy day.
Work kinda sucked and then I didn’t perform as well as I wanted to-or could have-during my WOD. I spent a ton of time breathing heavy and staring at my weight, which meant I was getting less work done. And that disappointed me. One of my coaches (Will) posted a status on Facebook that encouraged me. Will posted: “learning to be thankful for horrible training days. They keep you hungry, they give you perspective, and the day after when you show up at the gym, they build character, because you didn’t quit.”
Today, I am thankful for shitty workouts. Y’all know I usually try to censor myself on here (which is weird, because I am far from censored in real life) but that’s the only word I can find to describe yesterday for me. I literally felt discombobulated in the gym. During my workout, I felt like I couldn’t make my body work the way I wanted it to and it was the most frustrating feeling I’ve ever had. But today, I am thankful. I am thankful that yesterday’s workout reminded me-not only of how much further I have to go, but also how far I’ve come.
The suck of yesterday’s WOD reminded me of how bad it sucked when I first started and couldn’t do box jumps for anything. Literally. I was terrified all the time. Seven months ago, I had trouble cleaning 55#. Yesterday, I worked out with a 95# clean. And that’s the thing about CrossFit. Just when you think you’re getting good, you run into a skill or a weight, or a number of reps that’s going to knock you on your ass. And yesterday did. I was not happy with my performance. I was not happy with my time. I was not happy with myself after that workout.
And I am going to use it to make me better. I’m going to make sure that I focus my energies on the areas where I’m weak and let this failure make me hungry. I won’t let my body tell my mind that I can’t do something. I am grateful for experiencing shitty workouts that make me understand that I can work harder and push more. I have a long way to go before I reach my limit and-after yesterday-I’m even more determined to find out where that limit really is.